When Forgiveness Seems Impossible.

"Forgive and forget"

This is a real common phrase but how many of us manage to do that? I admit I can't.

It was found out that there's actually a distinct difference between 'forgive but not forgetting' with the usual 'cannot forgive hence cant forget.' I can assure that you're fine with forgiving but not forgetting. I mean if something had happened, how can one forget? But you can definitely tell if that someone has forgiven the other for that incident or not.

For example, about 10 years ago, your friend of yours complained bout you to your teacher and you were punished by your teacher for no apparent reason. At that moment of time, you were very angry with your friend and the friendship was called off from that time on. Then today your friend called you and wanted to meet up with you after 10 years. Now, if you're still harbouring the bitterness and still angry with your friend --- then you've not forgiven him/her and cannot forget. But in contrary, if you do not have the angry/bitter feeling towards him/her anymore but you still can remember the incident --- well, you've definitely forgiven that person already but you didn't forget the incident but this is still good. I mean, what had happened had already happened and nothing can turn back the time and how can one forget any incidents that had happened but the most important thing is are you still angry? If not, you've already forgiven that person. Congratulations.

Its just so simple isn't it? Don't let the bitterness/angry for no apparent reason eat you up while the person you're angry with doesn't even feel anything. They have nothing to lose but you, maybe you're even losing your health. Studies showed that people with unforgiveness and full of anger have higher chance in getting cancer and other diseases. It has something to do with the signals and nervous system.

There's this someone that I mentioned before had this huge misunderstanding and misjudgement of me for so many years already. This person has been harbouring anger and bad thoughts bout me all these years thanks to words of other people though I didn't do anything. God knows how long this anger has been in that person and how this might be eating that person up for no apparent reason but today, this person actually started a short and small conversation with me. That's really surprising and you can tell that this person has realised that it was just a misunderstanding and has wasted so many years of harbouring the anger and bitterness for nothing. I'm glad, I'm really glad that things are taking place.

If any of you feels that you've been angry with someone, maybe you can try forgiving that person? Harbouring anger and bitterness for someone (especially when that someone doesnt even know it) would just bring lost to yourself. And remember, not forgetting the incident doesn't mean you havent forgiven that person. Maybe you already had but you just didn't know it :)